My Name Is Nicolas Poliakoff
by Saphire-089
Summary: From The eyes of someone you'd least expect.


_To those reviewers asking me about my most recent Entry, _**This Feeling**_ that story will not be continued, because I felt that that was where it should end, and I didn't have Ulrich or Yumi confess, because it was meant to be fluffy, and I didn't want it to be a story, that had an ending that involving a hook-up, because if they had did that, I would then have to re-write the entire episode, because there's no way that if it had happened, either Ulrich or Yumi would have just forgotten about it, you know?_

_Anyways, enjoy this story, it's probably not the best in the world, but it was an idea that was floating around in my head, and I figured, why not try it._

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_**My Name Is Nicolas Poliakoff.**_

My name is Nicolas Poliakoff. I attend Kadic Academy in France. I have only two friends there to speak of: Herb Pichon, and Elizabeth "Sissi" Delmas, who is the spoiled principal's daughter.

At school everyone, including the teachers who work there see me as dumb and unintelligent, but the truth is, I wasn't always this way. But that is just the way I appear to be on the surface, it is what I want the world to think. So I can keep the truth hidden from everyone else.

I grew up in Paris, France. With my parents, and my older sister, Judith. Judith was the star child in the family, she was the one with all the good grades, the one who had all the friends, and the one involved in every club imaginable. I had none of that. Judith was everything I wasn't. She was "Little Miss Perfect." Mother, especially took a liking to Judith, and she was all Mother could see.

Growing up, Judith was treated like a princess, anything she ever wanted, she got, no questions asked. This is not to say that my parents didn't take care of me. I still got my three meals a day, warm shower, and new clothes to wear, but there was one thing missing. It was the love Judith received that I never did.

Sometimes, I would feel bitter towards Judith, because she had everything, and never seemed to have a worry in the world. For some reason, my parents favored her, _just because she was born first._ This never ceased to puzzle me. How could something as trivial as that prevent my parents from loving me as they had Judith?

What happened next, I never saw coming. During the summer that I turned 11, something happened that changed my world forever. My father had a heart attack. Dad was the only one in the family who seemed to really care about me. Sure, Dad cared about Judith just as much as Mother did, but he also made sure I was okay. So when the doctors at the hospital tried to tell me that he was dead, I just ran out door, and didn't stop running until I was on my front porch, feeling like throwing up, and wanting to cry. I could not accept the fact that someone who had truly loved me was gone.

With Dad gone, Mother who had never seen before eventually opened her eyes to me finally, but not in the way I would have liked. It was like she had made me her personal servant. Judith didn't have a curfew, was never grounded, and she didn't have any household chores to do. But for me, it was the opposite. Mother would have me clear the table after every meal, walk the dog who was so old, he was close to dying, pick up his business, do her taxes, and make sure the house stayed clean, or I would not be able to have any freedom of my own, so I did what I was told, while Judith had all the freedom she wanted.

My mother would always tell me: "Nicolas, you'll never achieve anything, so you might as well not bother to even try." She had not faith in me, just because I wasn't my sister. She would not even consider the possibility that I might be somewhat smart. To her, I was just a worthless nothing.

I once had a psychologist evaluate me, and he came back with the results that I had an above average IQ, not genius level, like Judith, but certainly not mentally challenged. My mother, however, just told the doctor she thought that he was only lying to make me feel better, but I just felt that she couldn't bear to think that anyone could be just as smart as her favorite.

My mother had developed a habit of going to bars, and becoming drunk, and coming home wasted, being in a bad mood (well to me, never to anyone else), and would yell at the smallest screw-up, even if it was just an accident. Sometimes, she came home with some strange guy she met there, and these men were usually jerks. She would start yelling, and hit me, and I would just stand there and take it, because I had learned from the first time I fought back, that she would just hit back even harder.

Back then I was attending a middle school, but I wasn't attending Kadic until two years later. I rarely had marks on my face, for mother's aim was worsening, but whenever a teacher did ask, I would just simply say I'd had some sort of accident, and they usually bought it. But Mother's verbal attacks, unlike her physical ones, were getting worse. She would call me all kinds of names, calling me stupid, and dumb, and all the while Judith just sat there, not saying anything at all, just looking at her feet and trying to pretend nothing was going on, that there wasn't a boy suffering a few feet away from her.

Because of her constant abuse, my self-esteem slowly vanished, until I had started to slowly dumb myself down, figuring that since nobody really cared what I did. My Voice even started to change slowly, and it made me sound different, but not in a good way. I sounded awful. My Report card grades went from A's, B's, and the occasional C, to D's, and the not-so-uncommon F. The teachers couldn't seem to see why my good grades had gone down the drains in a matter of a few months. I started to believe that I was just as dumb as Mother called me, and I couldn't seem to get it out of my head. But I knew that I could never tell me the truth.

My relationship with Judith wasn't really the best thing in the world, sometimes she felt sorry for me, because of what I always had to go through, but I grew to dislike her, because she never did anything to stop it. I could see that she was not as selfish as our parents, but she was also weak, because she didn't do anything to help the situation, or do anything that might do me any good for the future.

Despite my bad grades, I still got sent to Kadic Academy, because the teachers felt that I was just going through a rough patch, and felt that I could get better but despite their high hopes, I never did.

That first day I walked into Kadic Academy was like a blur, because it was like at home, where I was ignored, but this time, there was nobody to degrade me the way my mother had. I was happy that I finally got to go to Kadic, because I was finally away from my mother, and plus I had a dorm of my own. Well, not of my own, because I had a roomate, and this is how I met Herb. He was new too, and I always suspected that had a crush on her, so he hung out with her often, which led to me becoming friends with them both, seeing as though Sissi had no other friends.

I have never mentioned my past to anyone, nor do I intend to. To everyone Kadic, I'm the kid voted "Most Likely to Fail." Of course, this information goes unspoken, but I know It's there. Although if someone had known about my past, they might sympathize with me a little better, but I have no intentions of telling anyone. I was called a failure one too many times, and it is something that will affect me for the rest of my life. I know I ought to move on and forget about it, but there's a part of me that won't let me, and I'd never be able to explain the sudden good grades to my teachers

My name is Nicolas Poliakoff, this is my story of why I am the way I am, and this is who I am.


End file.
